Naked hedgehogs and kingfishers...

I love that postcard of two hedgehogs sitting together. Behind them is a coat-rack on which their "coats", their prickles, hang. The caption reads something like:

"I am completely at ease with you"

I find it SO appealing and yet i constantly question what it means for me. Is it because i am never at ease with myself that i am drawn to the dream, no the fantasy, that one day i might find myself at ease with myself enough that i really could be at ease with another?

I know that, with Gail, i am more at ease than with anyone else. I can walk naked in our home and let her see me without scurrying away or grabbing a towel or some item of clothing to cover my nakedness.

And yet i don't know how to reveal my self, how to grasp hold of the kingfisher even for one moment and experience that peace, a Halcyon pause.

Kingfisher is part of the Halyconidae family of birds. According to Greek mythology Halcyon days are the seven days in midwinter during which storms never occur. Alcyone married Ceyx, son of Eosphorus, the Morning Star. Legend tells that they used to call each other Zeus and Hera. Zeus, enraged by this disrespect, sent a thunderbolt to destroy Ceyx's ship while he was out at sea and Alcyone, on hearing of this in an apparition, threw herself into the sea. Out of compassion, the gods then changed the pair into halcyon birds. When Alcyone was ready to lay her eggs, her father Aeolus, the god of the winds, restrained the winds and calmed the waves so that she could make her nest on the beach and lay her eggs.

A few weeks ago, driving up the M9 towards Alloa, i was startled to see a kingfisher flying across the motorway. There was absolutely no doubting what i was seeing! That brilliant flash of blue-green, the low whirring flight, the size. I had to press my Bluetooth speaker button and summon my mother to her phone - i simply had to share what i'd just seen and i knew that she would understand and share my excitement...and indeed she did!

So what omen did this sighting possibly bring? The Kingfisher is a symbol of peace and prosperity. The Kingfisher is the promise of abundance -- its blue plumage is associated with Jupiter, the planet of abundance. People with a Kingfisher totem need to live as near as possible to water and as far north as possible. .. If a Kingfisher comes into your life, you might be required to dive headlong into some activity -- or possibly a new love will enter your life. No matter what it is, don't be afraid of trying the new. Kingfisher will be there to guide you. You won't drown -- and you will have sunshine, love and abundance!http://www.linsdomain.com/totems/pages/kingfisher.htm

Well, the new love had already entered my life and abundance and prosperity for me needs to be about love, shelter, support rather than finance, though sufficiency is obviously helpful! I need to learn to hold on to not being afraid of trying the new, believe that i won't drown. How curious that i have a deep-rooted fear of drowning and panic immediately when people are under water on television. In fact even writing about it is making me catch my breath and feel panicky...